Goodbye 2020

I've never run a marathon before, but I'd imagine the water stations throughout the race are a much welcomed gift for the runners as they either rehydrate or pour it on themselves to cool them down for the remainder of the race. I feel as though 2020 and beyond, for many, has been like running a marathon, but with no training whatsoever. We all desperately want the race to be over, but alas, it goes on for who knows how long.

Being able to spend a week to relax and be with family during Christmas week was a desperately needed water station for me.

Now back to the race. 

In a couple weeks, the middle and high school BLOCK program will begin meeting virtually on zoom. It has been repeatedly mentioned that the students that have been coming just want to meet up and hang out like they used to and not be on zoom, and I feel those desires myself. Doing ministry virtually has been like running with legs tied together. We've had great moments at camp, and even some amazing Bible studies since going virtual, but of course we hope and plan for the days when we can safely meet back together. On December 12th, we were able to meet up in person with families and others in the community and put on an outdoor family movie night. We watched Jingle Jangle (a Christmas musical on Netflix in case you're interested)! We had about 35 people show up throughout the night ranging from 3 years old to people in their 60s. Spread out in lawn chairs on our basketball court, families enjoyed hot chocolate, coffee, and popcorn with their movie. I'm excited to do this type of event again in the future!

My hope and vision for leading BLOCK virtually would be that we'd be able to reconnect with students that have been in our programs previously and that'd they would be the foundation for what BLOCK is. As students who've known each other for years regularly come, I pray and hope this creates a sense of belonging as many students and families have been isolated from each other for months. Please pray for the right students to show up. I can often feel the pressure to perform well in many aspects of life, and I don't want my identity to be bound to worldly success in ministry. I trust that God will use the next months to grow me, to humble me, and to use me as the marathon continues.

I'm reminded of Hebrews 12:1-2 which says, "Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God." The sin that clings to me often is pride, self-pity, resentment, and judgment. Lord, I throw this all aside for your name's sake. Let 2021 be a year we look back on with gratitude.

Question: How do we run this race that is set before us with endurance?

Answer: By looking to Jesus, who endured the cross for us, and is now seated at the right hand of the throne of God!

 

November (please read all the way to the end)

BLOCK Middle and High School Program: Starting in January of 2021, I will be taking over the BLOCK program. The previous program director will be stepping down but still hopes to participate when he can. In my history with 2nd Mile, I directed the after school program for two years, directed the middle school program for a little less than a year, and have only attended the high school program on a voluntary basis. I'm not gonna lie, I feel way out of my depth with this older age group. If I've known a student for many years, obviously it's easier to know where they're coming from, their families, their personalities, their future goals, etc. But new students, especially those with no previous connection to 2nd Mile or to church or to God (or even white people in the hood), I suppose that's where leaning on the Lord comes in. Next week Friday, 2nd Mile will be hosting an Outdoor Family Movie Night (socially distanced of course) with the hopes of bringing the relationships we've built back to the church for some good Christmas fun. Not meeting in person on a weekly basis has been a big speed bump in ministry, as I'm sure it is across the nation. Please pray that this night would be safe, enjoyable, and would have a big turnout (hopefully not too big where it becomes unsafe).

In case you want to watch what we will be watching, check out Jingle Jangle on Netflix. It's a family friendly musical and more importantly, has a cast where the majority of the actors are people of color. It's magical and entertaining. Get your hot chocolate, pop that popcorn, light a fire (only if you have a fireplace) and tap your feet with your family.

As We Gather: This newish program for the more elderly of folks has been going great. Created in order to allow members of that age bracket to connect, socialize, and learn about God, technology, and a host of other topics, As We Gather has been doing something brand new in the world of 2nd Mile--specifically reach out to non-youth. A few weeks ago I was asked to join the zoom call and talk about music and perform a few pieces of music. I miss being a part of a huge symphony, even a string quartet, playing with others, but it was good to get the old viola out and perform for others again. I played a few movements from the Bach Cello Suites to differentiate some different emotions that music has allowed me to express growing up (a slow and minor key for sadness, a peaceful major key to relax me or calm me down, and an energetically fast major key to pump me up). The response was great and then conversations began about people listening to different types of music to help facilitate their own moods. From what I've heard, participants in As We Gather have made art together, done daily devotionals together, and learned about different topics including health. We've also been blessed with an intern who specializes in computers, so she has been able to set up these seniors with laptops that we've received and help them troubleshoot, get online, and logged into zoom.

Max Update: Flashback one year, and Max would often vomit after feedings (maybe once a day). Since February or March of 2020, he has not thrown up. We were never really sure if the pukage was due to reflux or just a sensitive gag reflex. Without explanation or understanding, this has stopped and we have been so grateful to have to do less vomit laundry. This has since translated to more peed-on laundry but that's another story. Not puking anymore has given him more interest in tasting different foods. He would suck the life and flavor out of a chip or a bite of an apple, but swallowing, or "sending to his tummy" as we tell him, has been a difficult skill to master. Still sensitive to swallowing solids, Max could take up to an hour to swallow one bite of food. Chewing and moving food to his cheeks once inside of his mouth is hard for him to do. There has been progress, but it has been so slow that it's been hard for us to imagine him ever getting off his feeding tube. We just couldn't see it.

Fast forward to last week.

We noticed after being given a chip, he'd come back asking for another, only this time, it would only be a few minutes later. "He must've dropped it," I thought. But sure enough, he was doing a little bit of chewing and swallowing his bites with more consistency. On the long drive home from visiting family, he was eating Cheetos Puffs left and right. It seems that something may be clicking. This is honestly the first time in a long time where I could imagine him eating normally. This picture of him says a lot. It shows my hopes in getting him to eat more (I've never used that "plate" before with any sort of optimism). It shows him eating at the table (we rarely are able to eat our meals together due to his strict feeding schedule). It shows his face that I can't quite tell if it's just his normal silliness, him being shy, or prideful, or a "why are you taking a picture of me Dad?" face. Please pray for continued momentum in eating, patience and endurance on our end, and most of all a grateful heart in all circumstances.

Easy way to help us this holiday season: Do you shop on Amazon? Did you know that if you designate 2nd Mile Ministries as your charity of choice, Amazon will donate to us a small percentage of the amount you spend? It's no cost to you and it helps us out in a big way!

How to set it up is just a few clicks.

1. Go to Account & Lists and look for AmazonSmile Charity Lists

2. Click Get Started at the top or bottom of the page.

3. Type in 2nd Mile Ministries and select the one located in Jacksonville, FL.

4. Boom! All done.

It's important to note, IF YOU SHOP ONLINE AT AMAZON.COM, THE DONATION WILL NOT GO THROUGH. YOU NEED TO SHOP ONLINE AT SMILE.AMAZON.COM AND THE DONATION WILL AUTOMATICALLY BE GENERATED. You'll still be able to purchase the same exact things as before, only now Amazon knows to designate a little of their money to our ministry through your purchases. Easy peasy.

Shaking off the rust

I had all but given up, desperate for a sign from love. Something good, something kind, bringing peace to every corner of my mind. Then I saw the garden. Hope had come to me to sweep away the ashes and wake me from my sleep. I realized You never left and for this moment You planned ahead, that I would see Your faithfulness in all of the green. I can see the ivy growing through the wall because You will stop at nothing to heal my broken soul. I can see the ivy reaching through the wall because You will stop at nothing to heal my broken soul. Faith is rising up like ivy, reaching for the light. Hope is stirring deep inside me, making all things right. Love is lifting me from sorrow, catching every tear, dispelling every lie and torment, crushing all my fears. Now I see redemption growing in the trees, the death and resurrection in every single seed.

-Lyrics from Kari Jobe's The Garden.

Hearing this song before, the lyrics never really meant much to me personally...until I heard it while working in our garden. Currently, the garden is in the growing phase. We did a complete do-over in late September, taking out all the old plants, weeding all the garden beds, and filling them with new fertilizer. We planted different vegetables and have started to seeing them surface above the soil. Will the plants produce fully ripe vegetables? We have no idea, but had we not prepared the ground, planted the seeds, and watered, they definitely won't. Putting the seeds in the ground and seeing their growth day after day, I get easily frustrated when I see things that hurt the progress. I'll see leaves eaten by animals, I'll see weeds come up and compete for nutrients, I'll see some of our sprinklers clogged with dirt and not supplying the water needed. Growing food is something you can learn a lot about, but predicting the results, the seasons, the exact growth seems impossible. Much like life. We learn from our experiences on what not to do, how to protect ourselves from pain, and we still get hit by unexpected obstacles. We toil, we strive, we writhe, we want to grow and produce lots of good fruit. Here's how that works. Hint: it's not what you do, but what you surrender to the Father and allow Him to do in you.

Jesus says in John 15:1-5, I am the true vine, and my Father is the vinedresser. Every branch in me that does not bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit. Already you are clean because of the word that I have spoken to you. Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.

I imagine those first few years in the Garden of Eden were just a learning process for Adam. Nobody had ever worked the land before (obviously since he was the first person), so he had to learn how God had created the world to grow food and trees from just a single seed. I wonder if Adam ever did something that would look idiotic today, like just placing seeds on rocks, or throwing them high in the air thinking that made them grow taller.

I think in a lot of ways, people are operating in this pandemic like Adam may have, being the first gardener/farmer. We have no previous experience of how to do life in a pandemic, especially in this technological world. Since March, 2nd Mile has been learning a lot of ways how not to do ministry. It's difficult to see the fruit when we are so much about in-person relationships. When you are limited to virtual ministry, it feels like trying to grow flowers in a dark room. It feels unfair. There aren't many resources to how to effectively to a virtual ministry in a community that may not have to resources to even take part. We've had some success in seeing lots fruit in a very small number of students; however, we are still searching for how to reach more students effectively in this time.

This pandemic, although it has dramatically altered what we do and how we do it at 2nd Mile, it has allowed us to see other tasks that have been left ignored. For example, at the church, so many thorny vines has taken over our chain-linked fence that have grown up into our outdoor shed where we keep our landscaping tools. Vines are relentless and only need the tiniest of cracks in wood or walls to completely rip through, rip apart, and take over. There were also overhanging branches above the shed that were actually helping to grow unwanted vegetation on top of the roof. Also, our office had so many different types of supplies, not exactly in the best order. These things were important to take care of and had we continued our normal ministry activities, may have gone overlooked and seen as lower priority.

I don't want to go back to normal. But I also don't necessarily want this to be my new normal either. As I, as we all, are being transformed by the world around us, by health regulations, by government, by the status of our jobs, and even by just the normal stressful things in life, I pray that we remain in the true vine, Jesus, holding on for life. I've been hit with some curve balls in the last few weeks and could use some prayer, actual prayer, not well wishes or good thoughts, but prayer in the only one that can either remove the pain, or be present with me through it. Thank you for reading.

As we gather (September)

" I planted the seed, Apollos watered it, but God has been making it grow. So neither the one who plants nor the one who waters is anything, but only God, who makes things grow. The one who plants and the one who waters have one purpose, and they will each be rewarded according to their own labor. For we are co-workers in God's service; you are God's field, God's building." -1 Corinthians 3:6-9

Dark clouds above, gentle sprinkling of rain as we meet at the church to fill two wheel barrows with gardening gloves, water bottles, shovels, spades, and rakes, we anticipate a lot of work for the next couple of hours. Unsure of how many would show up to help spread natural fertilizer (3-yr old animal poop from the Jacksonville Zoo) on a bleak looking morning, we pushed on and we walked a couple of blocks from the church to our Nutritional Garden. The rain got heavier, the sky got darker, and I know everyone in their minds is going, "Are we really gonna do this right now?" Mr. Ron Pauline pulled up in his old squeaky one-mirrored pickup truck brimming with what was once animal feces and backed into the garden lot where about fifteen of us waited ready with shovels and dripping with rain. We had helpers anywhere from the age of 5 to 60. We took all that fertilizer and transferred it into all the garden beds which were previously weeded the week before in preparation for this day. A couple people shoveled the fertilizer into wheel barrows, another couple would walk the wheel barrows to the garden beds, and others would spread out the fertilizer with shovels and rakes. We were like a well-oiled, and might I say soaking, machine. After about a half hour, there wasn't a dry part of your clothing with which to dry your face. We had children, high school students, 2nd Mile staff, and other adult volunteers all serving together in battle.

Up until this day, a lot of the work in the garden has consisted of weeding, watering, and more weeding. The work we did at this action day has allowed us to start the planting process. It was like a clean reset button, a restart to what the garden is all about, growth. I've learned that even though I have nothing to do with the seeds sprouting, I can plant the seed, I can provide the water. With so much in life being out of my own control, I can still be faithful, I can still show up, not knowing what growth will be supplied by God.

After action day, I was amazed at just how good it was to see people in person, to work alongside people to achieve a common goal. It would've taken one person probably an entire day to accomplish what we did in an hour and a half. I agree with Paul in the Bible when he repeatedly talks about being encouraged to see believers in person or how he would walk miles out of the way in order to encourage another.

As We Gather - Currently, 2nd Mile has been developing a program for the older folks in our community. This will include some technological training as well as other activities. As the program develops, say a prayer for those it would help. We've gotten over a dozen computers and a connection with the Faith Building (a building close to my house for the elderly) in hopes that beginning this program will go smoothly, as smoothly as something can in this day in age.

I sincerely feel for those of you who are struggling, who feel alone, who don't know where to go with your stress. With each passing month I feel more and more the irony of our country's name, the United States of America. So much arguing, so much disagreeing, so much hatred, so little listening, so little compassion, so little humility. Covid, racial injustice, whatever that presidential debate was. I will pray that you trust in the Lord. "But blessed is the one who trusts in the LORD, whose confidence is in him. They will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit." - Jeremiah 17:7-8

And so begins the weirdest school year ever.....

Summer Day Camp 2020 - Camp is now over and the school year has just begun. If you want to see a short video from our camp director, Ahmad, go to the 2nd Mile Ministries facebook page. Honestly, it is probably one of our best videos we've done! Check it out! Ahmad is in college now and participated in our high school program when he was in high school. His heart for his own community has been evident as he has worked with us for the summer to create a uniquely awesome camp!

School year 2020-2021 - For right now, 2nd Mile Ministries has decided to meet virtually across all programs, unsure of how the school year will shake out. Currently, in Duval County, elementary school students are back in person Monday through Friday (but parents had the choice to enroll them in virtual), and high school students are in person twice a week and virtual the rest. We cross our fingers and send up prayers that our students, teachers, parents, and other educational workers are safe, wise, and diligent. I pray that all of said people will have grace for each other as 2020 will truly be a year for the ages. Pray for the two:fiftytwo After School Program as it goes online. Pray for the recruiting process, the curriculum, strength, patience, and innovation. Pray for the BLOCK middle and high school program. Pray for wisdom in how to approach this program online as well. The students who have been coming are gaining so much knowledge and wisdom. Pray for leadership to create a program that kids will want to be a part of, despite already being online for a lot of their day.

The Nutritional Garden - Last month, I asked if anyone had started doing anything during the pandemic that they might not have otherwise done. Answers included meditation, spending more time with family, exercising, etc. For me, one of my go-to's has been the garden. 2nd Mile has helped out at the Nutritional Garden for a number of year now. It's located just a couple blocks from the church where we do ministry and if you were new to the neighborhood, you might think it was a little out of place. It is built in a previously empty lot with residential houses on either side. We've grown many different vegetables, fruits, and herbs over the years, some of which I am still unacquainted with. Just in the last couple years, the garden has been given over to 2nd Mile Ministries to run and manage. I'm assigned once every other week or so to help water, weed, prune, harvest, clean, etc. Lately, weeding has been my primary focus at the garden. It's amazing how fast those weeds grow, especially in Florida. I want to devote a blog post just to how much gardening reflects life. I can understand why Jesus used parables involving trees and seeds and water to describe the spiritual life. Oh well, for another time.

We have recently received grant money specifically to be used in the garden. This money allows us to put in new wooden fences along the sides of the garden (the old ones have rotted and been overtaken by vines). There is also a chain-linked fence near the back mural that existed as part of an alleyway that probably was utilized decades ago. This fence will also get removed and allow for a more open feel. If you have any interest in gardening and would like a tour, (even a virtual tour), I'd be happy to give one. If you would be interested in giving towards our garden expenses, thankfully, it's pretty cheap to run. Right now, our only cost is our water bill. On average, our water bill is $37 per month. Would you consider donating this amount to 2nd Mile Ministries on our website, 2ndmilejax.com?

And lastly, if you'd rather give a one-time donation, I have one more request. Our basketball hoops at the church have been a game-changer for how many people have come to the church to just hang out. Within the last school year, one of the backboards cracked, and those cracks have over time turned into giant holes. The backboard/rim system that fits our cemented poles at the church are here, amazon.com/backboardandrim It is specifically the 48in one. If you're interested in shipping one to us, you can send it to my address at 3646 Brentwood Blvd., Jacksonville, FL 32206. If you are interested in just donating money for us to buy them, they are $179 each. We are hoping to get two. And if you are unable/unwilling to give at this time, perhaps you know someone who may be interested in giving.

(If you decide to give, please either give those specific amounts (so we know their intent), or just leave a comment in the comment section when you give.)

Thank you for reading. May God bless you and encourage you as the new school year begins!

Nearing the end of Camp

Summer Day Camp - We are nearly finished with our 6 week long virtual summer day camp. This year has thrown us surprises that have forced us to be innovative and flexible. As mentioned in the previous month's blog, we meet virtually Monday through Thursday, and have attempted to meet in person on Fridays. As of right now, with the number of positive cases surging in the Jacksonville area, we have decided to finish out camp completely virtual. However, the kids were lucky enough to meet up at the church for one more Friday to make giant bubbles, build intricate balloon animals, and oh yeah, MEET SOME ANIMALS FROM THE JACKSONVILLE ZOO! In review of the camp, it seems that the Camp in a Box idea has been a success! As the school year is right around the corner, we are proceeding with caution. There will be more updates on our plans for other programs hopefully next month.

BLOCK - Our middle and high school program has had its ups and downs. Currently, we meet every Tuesday night via zoom, and the kids that have been coming have been hungry for the word of God. When asked to think through questions they have about God, the Bible, and life in general, these students came back with thought-provoking questions, questions they had clearly been wrestling with in the past. 

"Why does God let bad things happen?"

"Are women allowed to be pastors?"

"What do I do with my anger towards someone who hurt me?"

We answered these questions to the best of our abilities and with Scripture that God had put on our hearts. The students soaked up every word. Praise God for their pursuit of the Lord their excitement to see what the word of God says! This is great news for the kids who have been attending, but it has been difficult to get more kids to join in on the virtual calls. With school starting up, knowing that many of them will be learning virtually at least for the beginning of the school year, will the kids want to get on yet another virtual call? With the summer nearing its end, what type of content, what type of programs, what type of activities will effectively engage middle and high school students to want to hop on a call? If you have answers, suggestions, or even any helpful input or experience in this, please email me at lilvollmer@gmail.com.

Nutritional Garden - About once every other week, I go to our neighborhood garden that 2nd Mile maintains and spend lots of my time pulling weeds, watering plants, and dreaming of what it would look like if the garden was flourishing. My creative juices start flowing in thinking of ways to improve a garden that almost seems too full of potential. Please pray that God would give me wisdom to discern what this creative surge is doing and why I'm drawn to the garden more and more. I feel a shift coming at some point, a positive shift. This could be because of the pandemic and being cooped up for so long, or maybe it could be the necessary slowing down that my life really needed to see what God has been doing in my heart.

And finally, I leave you with a video I'd like for you to watch. It's a series called "Uncomfortable Conversations with a Black Man." A black man answers questions that some people might be too afraid to directly ask a person of color. He also brings guests in subsequent episodes to hear from others. In one he brings out interracial couples. In another he invites white parents who have adopted children of color. What I love about the series is that everyone that comes on has not only the ability to share their own personal experiences to the group, but there is a posture of respect and humility and willingness to listen of others. For me, it's hard to ask people questions sometimes, because it might expose my lack of knowledge or awareness, or it requires me to listen to someone else's point of view which may clash with mine. A great way to show you love and care about someone is to ask them questions and just listen. I encourage you to watch at least this first episode.

Thank you for reading this blog.

Quran and an armadillo from the zoo

Andre engaging in bubble-ology!

Olivia with a balloon octopus

Belief vs. Faith

BLOCK Middle and High School Program : For months now, we have been meeting via zoom call every Tuesday night. Some weeks we'll have nearly 20 people on call, others maybe like 5. It's difficult to know exactly the impact these meetings have been having, but I do know one thing--it's very apparent that the students that have been coming consistently are hungry to learn and grow. I don't remember me or my friends in high school being as wise and thoughtful as our students are about their lives, their faith, and their futures. In the past few weeks, we've been focusing on the ideas of belief in God and faith in God. As the students shared their thoughts about the difference between these two, we came to the agreement that faith is when your actions change due to your belief. "You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that--and shudder." James 2:19. What do you do with your belief? The BLOCK director used the analogy of a chair to demonstrate faith. Unless a chair looks rickety and unable to hold under the weight of a pop-a-squat, we rarely question its ability to hold us when we sit. Even now, I've been trusting the chair I'm sitting in to do what it does and I don't have to worry about falling. And how much more reliable and powerful and in control is our God! I sometimes find myself questioning God's goodness in showing up, despite his immovable and unchanging character. He hasn't changed, my trust in him has changed. How awesome those times in my life have been where the things of this world grow strangely dim when I turn my eyes and my walk completely on Jesus!

(BLOCK prayer request: We've had a difficult time reaching middle school students specifically during this new virtual world. Pray that more kids would be reached via zoom, or for God to open up other creative options to connect and build into his children)

Summer Day Camp : The year 2020 has forced us as well as many others organizations and entities to evolve and adapt and get creative. 2nd Mile has created Camp in a Box! Each week of camp, the campers receive a big Lowe's cardboard box filled with the weeks activities, supplies, and materials. Each week has a different theme (ex: nature, animals, water, etc.). Each day has a different type of activity (ex: art, Bible lesson, snacktivity, etc.). We just finished week 1 of 6 for our summer day camp. Monday-Thursday from 1:30-3pm, students ages 7-12 get on a zoom call where high school and college aged counselors lead different breakout groups for different groups of kids. Fridays, for now, the plan is to meet in person at the church while taking many safety precaution amid corona virus concerns. This past Friday, we learned about what parts of the plant different vegetables are. Honestly, even I learned some things, like broccoli is the flower of the plant and carrots are the roots of the plant. We also walked a couple blocks from the church to our neighborhood garden where the kids filled their painted pots from art day with soil and carrot seeds. There were about a dozen students in attendance and about 12-15 students on zoom calls. As the number of positive covid cases skyrockets in Florida and even more specifically, Jacksonville, we are operating knowing that we may need to be flexible with our schedule and plans for future weeks.

(Camp prayer requests : Wisdom with decision making, healthy students/counselors/staff, that the kids would have fun and learn, and finally that the love of God can be translated through us to the students.)

In other news... : There is so much happening in the country, even worldwide, concerning systematic racism, injustice, Black Lives Matter, police brutality, defunding the police, and so on. Before I share what I'm about to share, I just want you to identify the emotions or thoughts you feel when you read that list of topics. Maybe certain ones make you tense, maybe they fire you up with absolute support or absolute rejection, maybe there's lack of knowledge and a temptation to deflect or ignore these issues that seemingly don't directly and immediately effect you. Wherever you are on the spectrum, I hope you are able to self-diagnose why you feel the way you do. 

In regards to living in faith and not just belief, I'd ask you...do black lives matter? "All lives matter." Yes. Every human being should be treated with dignity, respect, and love. We are to love our neighbors as ourselves. That, however, has not been the experience of the average black man or woman in America. I could recommend a bunch of shows, movies, books, and music to help you understand the generational pain that's lasted for centuries, but my question to you would be, would you be willing to take that step to watch, read, or listen? A couple of months ago I wrote in the blog about entering in to another person's pain, which is truly good for the heart. However, it's an exercise that is not so easily put into habit. I feel and fear that the further away from the freshness of George Floyd's death, the less important people not of color may feel their need or desire is to fight. (I've felt the same with covid stuff, it was everywhere in the news to begin with, then businesses start opening up, the initial doomsday mentality is gone, and positive tests skyrocket, but I digress. Wear a mask. Be decent.) Racism still exists even if there are not weekly protests going on or big headlines.

Anyways, if you have a belief that black lives do in fact matter, how are you currently walking that out in faith? If this is a hard question to pinpoint an answer, I'll ask perhaps a more encouraging question. If you have a belief that black lives do in fact matter, and don't know how to walk that out in faith, what initial steps could you take to walk that out in faith? Everybody is different, but probably a good rule of thumb is, be humble, don't assume you know everything, educate yourself, be a person who is quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry. Missi and I recently watched the movie Marshall (not the one about the football team) and Just Mercy. Both about court cases in different eras. It brings to light the racism, biases, and unjust legal system prevalent in society. The documentary 13th will always be a recommendation from me. Movies are easier recommendations to make than books for me. Once starting a movie, it's hard for me to not watch the whole thing. Not sure which of these are still free to watch on Netflix, Prime, or Hulu, but take a look if you have those platforms.

I'll be honest. I feel a lot of things and sometimes struggle confronting these painful stories over and over again. But having the ability to hide from injustice and wrap myself up in my privilege is not something people of color get to do. This just reminds me of my weaknesses and reinforces just how strong Jesus must have been to enter in to the hurt and pain of those "sinners" that the Pharisees felt he had no business fighting for.

(My prayer for you, whoever you are, is this: I pray that wherever you are in your feelings, opinions, allegiances, spirituality, or morals, that God would give you more and more capacity and willingness in your heart and mind to understand, to empathize, and to love your black neighbors, whether you see them on the daily or not. I pray that your growing understanding, empathy, and love would be moved to words and actions. I pray that your words and actions would display the love that Christ showed us, laying down his life on behalf of another. Lord, be with those who have read this blog, those whom you've convicted to take a step, and know that what they do for one of the "least of these", they do unto you. Amen.)

Who is my neighbor?

Kirk Franklin's song Imagine Me. (2009, junior year of college)

Phillip LaRue's Window. (2011, just out of college)

The McClurkin Project's Healing Grace. (2013, a few years living in Jacksonville)

Maverick City Music's (ft. Dante Bowe) Take Me Back. (May 14th, 2020).

These are the only times in my life where I can recall a particular song moving me to tears. In every case, it was the first time hearing those songs, not knowing what it was about, and God moving in my heart to hit me unexpectedly, reminding me that he knew exactly where I was, who I was, and what I was going through. Tears are healing. Two weeks ago, I was hit by Take Me Back. At the time, I was going for a long long walk in our big local cemetery contemplating the aging process, seeing the dates of thousands of births, the dates of thousands of death, when this song came up randomly in my youtube auto-play.

I remember when I was young

And your voice, shouting loud my name

And since that moment, I haven't heard it quite that way

Well, now that I'm older,

Could you say it again?

It was at that last line I lost it and knew I needed to hear every single word of the rest of the song. The times I feel God's presence most have been in these unexpected times of just waiting and listening. There is nothing I can do to conjure up those feelings or tears, it is completely at God's will to move.

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Not exactly sure why I felt the need to share the above, maybe just to document my humanity and God's existence for a later time when I'm discouraged and reading these blogs back for direction.

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Mother's Day 2020. I love my mom a lot. I love that my wife is a mom a lot. But I couldn't get Ahmaud Arbery's mom out of my mind. I prayed for her even though I didn't really even know how. There has to be so much confusion, anger, frustration, and perhaps hatred surrounding that situation. As I was trying to find an interview I watched a few weeks ago, I see now that an arrested man was killed by a cop in Minneapolis with a knee to his neck, begging for air. If you were of the African American community, you'd have a tough time trusting cops when you hear stuff like this happen all too often. I'm having a hard time continuing my typing. The interview I was trying to find had to do with the idea that in these days, blackness is being criminalized. When we live in fear, in generalizations and prejudice, it has so many unseen negative ripple effects. I love where I live. I love this neighborhood. People here have been through so much pain and injustice and want to live in a safe place just like the rest of the world. I love hearing distant hip hop beats during cookouts and celebrations. I love hearing nearby fireworks (not necessarily the noise, but knowing those people are having a good time). I love how people stay out on their porches, and greet walkers as they go by. Life is a shared gift. Although we all have our own individual selves and will have a birth date and a death date on our gravestones when this is all said and done, life is given to us for two reasons--to love, honor, and give glory to God with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength, and to love our neighbors as ourselves.

If your definition of neighbor is who lives to your immediate left and right, you wrong. In response to this question, Jesus answers with the good Samaritan parable. Be kind to those who are getting unfairly treated. Either stand up for an individual you meet, or speak up for a people who have been dealt with unfairly for centuries and continue to be.

I'm not so good with conveying exactly the feelings I have about all that I experience, learn, and know, but I hope this blog is not just another source to read and consume and remain unchanged and unconvicted. Pray for my black neighbors, my black brothers and sisters every single time you see something in the news regarding racial injustice. Imagine the emotions you'd be going through if that man was your son, or your brother, or your best friend, or your dad.

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We are meant to engage injustice as Christians because justice is near to God's heart. We are not meant to be like Pontius Pilate who washed his hands "clean" of any blame for Jesus's crucifixion. Stepping aside from the chaos does not make it go away, it just keeps us from experiencing more of Christ's redeeming work.

Take a listen.

Frustration is better than laughter

Ecclesiastes 7:2-4 says, "It is better to go to a house of mourning than to go to a house of feasting, for death is the destiny of everyone; the living should take this to heart. Frustration is better than laughter, because a sad face is good for the heart. The heart of the wise is in the house of mourning, but the heart of fools is in the house of pleasure."

These verses may seem backwards than what we feel in our collective realities. Frustration is better than laughter? Mourning better than pleasure? How does that work? What's going on here? Because to me, it feels an awful lot like I'd rather laugh than mourn. I don't believe this verse is saying there is anything wrong with joy, happiness, and laughter, but because this passage makes no initial sense, it begs to be read again and again.

In my life experience, the times I've been closest to God have been out of times of frustration, times of deep mourning or lament, times when the illusion of life being in my control is most obviously illusion.

To put things bluntly, everybody dies and we shouldn't ignore this fact. How is the knowledge that you will die someday effect how you live your life? Us living people should take this to heart. Why is this corona virus pandemic so serious? It brings us closer to the uncomfortable reality of our mortality and we don't want to think about it right now. A hundred years after your death, your existence will have been forgotten.

What do you do with your frustration and your mourning? I heard an old SNL veteran say in an interview that comedy is just pain. It's duty is accomplished by hiding the heavy burden of life. I don't always trust people's jovial mood's because they can just be a mask, a lie covering up deep sorrow, but I've never stumbled upon a fake sad face. There's something so raw about it. I've witnessed and have even been a part of God's healing power through tears and prayer. It's in the times that I've willingly stared pain in the face that I've been transformed. So often we feel frustrated and we don't want to feel it, so we run to pleasure, laughter, novacaine, addictions, gossip, slander, violence, or whatever will dissipate the stress.

News stories that make us sad? Click, find something else. Pictures of people dying in hospitals? Click, Netflix. Pain hurts. That's obvious. If the only pain you've been feeling this past month has been not seeing people in person, having to balance work and parenting simultaneously, or even being out of a job, that would be enough to rattle anyone. It's easy to feel the most hurt for our own situations. However, I challenge you to enter in to someone else's pain. They may not express their hurt fully, but imagining how you would be feeling going through their stuff and connecting with them or even praying for them can be used in amazing ways by God. In fact, why don't you take a minute right now, maybe two minutes if you need, and think about someone you know personally that is going through a rough time (either because of the corona virus or not), imagine how you would be feeling if that same thing was happening to you, and pray for them. Enter into their hurt willingly. I'm still amazed that Jesus wept with the sisters when their brother Lazarus died, even though he knew that in a moment he would be raised back to life. Jesus entered into their pain, and he does our pain as well, in order to bring life, to bring healing. Allow God to show you how life can come from death. Pray for that person. If you're being led, call them and pray for them over the phone or over some video call.

Quick Ministry Update - We held our first virtual BLOCK meeting on Tuesday with about 15 participants. It was encouraging to see people's faces again after about a month and a half. In weeks, prior to this meeting, we've contacted parents and students to make sure they had everything they needed--computers, wifi, food, or other resources. In case you couldn't think of someone in the above exercise, let me tell you about Ja'von's mom. Ja'von is an 8th grader who has come to 2nd Mile just this past year. The high school director and I dropped off little treat bags and drink bags for the students this week to let the kids know we've been thinking about them. When I went to deliver Ja'von's, I got to talk to his mom. Unfortunately I forgot to ask her name (God knows) but she was recently denied food stamps for the months of May, June, and July. She does not have a car. Thankfully her husband still works and takes the family car to work. Her kids are in virtual school and Ja'von has fallen behind. She has been helping him catch up with his homework and struggles to put food on the table. Thankfully in our neighborhood, students can get a free lunch at any public school, with the exception that a parent or guardian is present. Without a car, this asthma-having mom cannot always make the walk (closest school with lunches is maybe a mile away in the Florida heat). She was in the hospital with an upper respiratory infection (tests were negative for covid) and she is not allowed to go back to her job until she has proof from a doctor that her health is improving. How would you be feeling as a mother? As a provider? As a worker? Please say a prayer for her and her family. Enter into that pain. It's been easy for me to include people's names and situations in my prayer requests and ignore the hurt and pain that comes with it. Say a prayer now if you can spare a minute, enter into that pain.

This exercise may not have been "fun", but hopefully you found it good for the heart. 

"The heart of the wise is in the house of mourning, but the heart of fools is in the house of pleasure."

Backyard fun on the daily

Treat bags for BLOCK students to enjoy

Calloused

March is usually the time we are at our busiest at 2nd Mile. Normally, we'll have some college teams from across the country come help our community for their spring breaks. Unfortunately, only one team was able to come this year due to all the cancellations of campuses, schools, and strong encouragements not to travel. There were 10 people who came from Northwestern College in Iowa (a school that has faithfully come eight of the last nine years). They volunteered at our local elementary schools in the mornings and then in the afternoons either helped at our after school program or helped clean a local church (bathrooms, hallways, classrooms, raking leaves outside, etc.).

The future groups that ended up canceling were going to help out in our community garden, building a couple new garden beds that are beginning to rot. However, as the world continues to wait out this virus, we too at 2nd Mile are wondering what this means for our ministry's day-to-day. At first, spring break was extended for another week, then they closed schools until April 15th, and now they've extended it for May 1st. I get the feeling there will be no more school until the fall. The staff has been practicing social distancing, having video meetings, and trying to figure out what exactly we can do to serve those families that we are connected to. The schools are provided free lunches for any student that shows up, some schools are sending home computers so that learning can be continued at home. It's been a very backwards world right now and I can't help but wonder what it all means and how the world will come out on the other side.

In high school, I ran track for four years and cross country for three. From those years, my endurance was high and my resting heart rate was low, and the bottoms of my feet became hardened. In college, when I attempted to build upper body strength by doing pull-ups every night, my hands too became hardened in order to increase my grip on the bar. When I picked up guitar, also in college, my desire to learn how to play pushed myself passed those initial days of sore fingers on the nylon strings. Eventually, the tips of my fingers were hardened. 

In the past couple weeks of social distancing and quarantine, I decided to do some yard work. In Florida, like most places, it isn't necessary to mow the yard over the winter; however, come spring there are tons of leaves on the ground and weeds have grown as fast as weeds grow. It took me four different raking days over the course of two weeks to get all the leaves collected and bagged. In that time, I developed quite a few blisters on my hands, making each subsequent raking day a little bit more painful and frustrating, but I raked on. Finally after all the raking, I could mow the yard for the first time in 2020. Afterwards, I've been blessed with a good looking yard, and calloused hands.

It amazes me how God created our bodies to adjust to the strain we put on them. Working out new muscles breaks them down and builds them back up, but we endure the soreness. Doing repetitive and unfamiliar work develops endurance and callus, but we go through blisters, cuts, and bruises. I can only think that as a country, nay, as a humanity everywhere, we are experiencing the blister phase or the soreness phase of this corona virus. Doctors and nurses are fatigued, probably both mentally and physically. Parents who now have to work from home and teach their kids are at a loss as to how to do all aspects of their lives well. From social distancing, many people are either bored, stressed out, or "going crazy" in this new norm of life which is unpredictable and unknown as to when we will get back to normal. 

So what comes out the other side? It's gotta be callus. It's gotta be endurance. I don't know exactly how God will use this pandemic for his glory but in my personal life, I'm recognizing my need for God in every moment. Every hour I need thee. When I'm stressed, give it to God. When I'm accomplishing tasks, thank God. When I'm thinking about how someone is doing during all of this, pray to God and maybe text them.

I see callus in a video of Cuban doctors coming off a plane in Italy to help with the high number of cases there. I see callus in innovators making more and better face masks for workers in the hospitals. I see callus in people connecting more than they have in the past via video call. I see callus in churches conducting live streaming services.

As for 2nd Mile, we still exist, it just looks a little different in the day to day. We check in with families to make sure all is well, giving info on services provided by the different organizations in regards to food and supplies, and planning for whenever we get back in the swing of things.

As for me and my family, we are well. Missi is working from home now and Max has no idea anything is different in the world. We go for walks, play in the backyard, and are trying to potty train him (let's just say progress is slow). If you are bored or non-essential and wanna chat, hit me up. Or, just let me know that you are bored and I'll hit you up.

God, forgive us for the times we scramble and try to find our own way, our own comfort, our own meaning in our lives. Remind us of your goodness and your power Lord. Lift up your children's hearts to you that we may see your heart for those in need. Use us Lord for your will and not our own. Amen.


Check out this song. I've had it on repeat for weeks. Reminds me of God's presence. Good vibes. "Not Too Far" by GAWVI.

Here's a couple snapshots of my life this past March

Jaiden picking lettuce for salads at 2:52

Max playing outside

February

God is moving. Something is going on and we are anxious to see what it is. Each new week of BLOCK (middle and high school program) we are greeted with more and more people. We have a solid group of adults who come, and rather than having their family responsibilities hinder their attendance, those volunteers have brought their spouses, their kids and multiplied the feeling of family within the ministry. I've really appreciated the intentionality of having a meal together at one table (several connected tables) each week, talking about our weeks, and discussing the topic for that week. For the next few weeks/months, we will be discussing what it means to surrender--surrendering our possessions, our thoughts, our plans, our attitudes, etc. In a neighborhood where having the best shoes or newest phone are a big status booster, the students are all familiar with desiring things that others have rather than being content with what they already have. Hebrews 13:5 says, "Keep your life free from the love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, 'I will never leave you nor forsake you.' " 

I've often struggled with the concept of complete surrender to God. I like to be in control, to have a good idea as to how life is going to affect me today. In prayer, I have no problem believing that God has the power and ability to answer my big prayers, but I sometimes question and doubt his willingness to take action. Will God actually help me? Does he want me to sit in this tough place to strengthen my faith in him? I'm currently reading Job and he had it bad. He followed hard after God, God blessed him with so many possessions and a big family, and then it all got taken from him. To make sense of the devastation Job was going through, his "friends" came to him to explain their take on his plight. Maybe it was Job's sin? Maybe Job was prideful? Sometimes I want to badly to know exactly God's intentions with my life and the life of those around me. But God does not have to explain himself, ever.

Prayers have been answered at 2nd Mile and we have hired a new Executive Director. George Maxey officially started a couple weeks ago and I believe he will multiply our impact in Brentwood with his connections and his experience with building up communities. Whereas 2nd Mile has primarily focused on the youth in our history, I know he has a heart to reach entire families. Please pray for his transition to 2nd Mile as well as our transition to him as our boss.

With March already here, you can also pray ahead of time for our mission teams that come for their spring breaks to help us with work projects. Their presence is always energizing to the staff and the kids love seeing new people to play games with. Have a blessed March.

Redeemed Brokenness

two:fiftytwo After School Program - The new year has brought in a new schedule for me, not too different from 2019, but enough to be put into another adjustment period. Currently at the after school program three days out of the school week, I get to see the kids more, have better traction with continuing conversations with them, and also get to see more of their human natures. Behaviors that used to frustrate me and force me to process my life decisions now allow me to have more meaningful conversations about growth, making good decisions, and reconciling with the other students. I enjoy these kids a lot, each having their own unique gifts and personalities from God on display every day. I get annihilated Jabarie each day in rock, paper, scissors, where the winner of the whole school year will either get a big bag of hot fries (if he wins) or a two-liter of soda (if I win). Quran's kindness is shown towards the students who either fall during rec time or don't have anyone to play with. Over the years, Andre has enjoyed learning how things work (power tools, typewriter, computer keyboards, etc.).

It has been great to get to know these students more and more. I pray that God would reveal himself to these students in how He's made them, how He loves them, and what He wants them to do with their lives. The students got the chance in previous weeks to get pictures taken of them doing something they enjoy. We would then take those photos and transfer them to wood for an art project. The kids got really into it and I hope they get to experience many things as they grow older, in order to find something that ignites their excitement for life. Five of our seven 5th grade students have been in the program since 2nd grade. What's crazy is that they will join the other middle school and high school students next year in our BLOCK program. 

BLOCK - In case you haven't read the blog in a while, BLOCK (Building Leaders of Christ's Kingdom) has now incorporated both High School and Middle School students. The first two weeks of this merge, two volunteers gave their very powerful testimonies. Lots of suffering, lots of sinful choices, but so much grace from God. I've never seen that many teenagers that quiet in a room before. They hung on to their every word. Peoples' stories can be so powerful, and yet we often don't get past the surface in many of our encounters with others. One skill that I've been working on (that is definitely still not natural to me) is being an active listener, asking more questions than giving my own personal anecdotes. Trying to see the world through someone else's point of view can be so difficult, especially if I am more me-focused. There is power in hearing the gritty, embarrassing, shameful details of someone's life. I think we as people learn very quickly that there are some parts of our own stories that we feel we need to hide from others, keep to ourselves. Having the freedom to be open and honest about emotions, about difficult circumstances, difficult topics is so hard. "Can I trust you with this?" is often how we internalize and eventually rationalize that "No I cannot." My hope and prayer for these middle and high schoolers would be that they feel comfortable sharing their own stories, knowing that they are not alone in feeling alone, lost, unloved, unloveable, etc. Shared brokenness births community, births family. I feel that we as the church should "boast of our weaknesses all the more gladly so that the power of Christ may rest upon us." (2 Cor. 12:9). I know that God can work in mighty ways if we trust in him. I urge you, reader, for the sake of Christ, to humble yourselves by confessing your sins to one another and pray for one another that you may be healed. (James 5:16).

Goodbye 2010's

Happy New Year and Happy New Decade! There will be some changes at 2nd Mile Ministries and I hope you will be in prayer with us as we enact those changes. Our Connect Middle School program and our BLOCK High School Programs will be merging starting this month. We will meet weekly. The two programs will eat together, play together, and then as the night goes on, we will do small group discussions separately as the age gap may prove to bring out different levels of understanding. Please pray that the program merge will help grow a bigger community of students, that the older students will help build up and not tear down the younger students, and that the staff and volunteers would be of one accord. Looking forward to what's new in the new year is an exciting place of unfamiliarity and trusting in God to show up. 

e beneficial to split up.

For this blog, I thought it might be fun to look back at the 2010's, and think through my top 10 moments or memories in somewhat chronological order.

1.) Summer Internship, June, 2010. After spending a summer in inner city Milwaukee the summer prior, I decided to spend a summer in the bold city of Jacksonville, working in a low-income neighborhood, putting on a summer day camp at a ministry I would eventually call my job, my home, and my life. That summer really changed what I thought about life as a Christian, and how I thought about spending my time and effort. I became close with the other interns, had a lot of fun at camp, and was hit hard by God's love for those kids, imagining where they'd be when they got older.

2.) My friend Sarah's wedding, October, 2010. As I mentioned before, the summer of 2009 was my Milwaukee summer, where God gave me a brand new point of view about the world. I was first exposed to the devastating realities of financial poverty, spiritual poverty, and homelessness. Through this difficult but powerful summer, I went to battle together with strangers from other colleges who have become family to me. Sarah was one of these people and it was at her wedding where nine of us reunited and had a great time. We played games, talked about how our lives have been different since that summer in the city, and it was a very encouraging time for us. I remembered in the Bible when Paul would be encouraged and also encourage other believers just by going to see them again. Never have I felt non-family members feel more like family.

3.) CCDA, 2011. The Christian Community Development Association, founded by John Perkins, is an annual conference where people around the country who work for similar organizations like 2nd Mile, worship together, exchange ideas, and most of all, learn ways to better serve their respective communities. This was my first experience with CCDA. I've been to their conferences in Indianapolis, New Orleans, and Detroit over the years. One speaker came and totally opened my eyes to a topic that seems to be swept under the rug in American history. Yes, we learn about slavery, about the Civil War, about Civil Rights, basically history of black and white conflict. But Richard Twiss came to talk about his people, the Native American, and their plight, their experience and history. I remember the room fell silent as he spoke, the room gave him a huge applause as he finished, and the room humbly prayed afterwards in response. It was one of two times that I felt I needed to purchase a talk from these conferences that talk and watch at a later time and I still have that talk to this day.

4.) Artistic awakening, 2012-Present. I had some recurring dreams in 2012 about a tree residing near a ginormous waterfall, and felt that I needed to paint it. My only painting experience being in elementary school, I didn't really know what I was doing. It took a long time but I painted it. Ever since then, the creativity God has given me has allowed me to express my thoughts, ideas, and even emotions through art since then and it's been a great outlet for me to feel closer to God who created me.

5.) The Proposal, September, 2013. I was nervous of course, but was more excited to blind-side Missi with my question. She had asked me earlier that week if I thought I was ready for marriage. Taking her question very literally in order to throw her off, I said something like, "Not right 'now'," knowing that I would be "ready" in a few days. I knew I wanted to marry her when we started dating, and the eventual marriage was finally set in motion. It's exciting to follow through with a plan that was years in the making.

6.) The Wedding, June 21st, 2014. Getting to see my biological family, my college family, some of my Milwaukee family, and my 2nd Mile family all at the same party was unforgettable. Knowing that it will never happen like that again (at least until death) is sad to think about. I would finally get to show "the world" my commitment to Missi and we'd live together forever. That day went by so fast and I regret not eating more, not hydrating as much (I had a headache after dancing to a few songs), but the memories are still quite vivid. Missi and I hate being the center of attention, so you'd think I'd be uncomfortable with this big party being for just us, but it was such a celebration of how God has provided and loved me through those amazing people that attended that I just enjoyed every minute of it. Sometimes Missi and I jokingly talk about going back and getting married again.

7.) MAXIMUS!! February 22nd, 2017. Even before he was born, I loved this baby. After two miscarriages, this pregnancy really increased our faith in God and in prayer. "Do not be anxious about anything, but in EVERYTHING, by prayer and supplication, let your requests be made known to God, and the PEACE of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6-7. We prayed every day for our baby to be okay once we learned that Missi's water broke at 19 weeks. I can't explain the peace I felt even though the situation was not great. God blessed us with hope and peace and faith during that time and ever since we were surprised with a boy, he has made us stronger as parents and as people. He continues to bring joy in our lives every day, our goofy, smart, and happy boy.

8.) KAA, June, 2018. There's nothing quite like getting to see students step out in faith and make decisions to either accept Christ for the first time or rededicate their lives to Christ. I was in charge of six students, who I've known for a collective 31 years (if that makes any sense). It was a great week to relax, invest in the what the students were learning, and even teaching a few times throughout the week as well. I can still see the impact of that week on those kids to this day.

9.) New Places!

9a.) Jamaica, April, 2014.

9b.) Alaska, August, 2015.

9c.)Vermont, August, 2018. 

-One of my college roommates got married in Jamaica a couple months before my own wedding. It was dope. Went outside the country, jumped off what seemed to be a huge mountain (it was a 35ft cliff), was barefoot in a beach side wedding, lots of memorable firsts.

-For many many years, my answer to the question "Where would you most want to visit in the world?" was always Alaska. I love Jack London's White Fang and I guess wanted to see mountains, glaciers, vast nature. Getting to go on a cruise with my wife and in-laws was amazing. Zip-lining, getting pulled by sled-dogs, kayaking in crystal clear water was awesome.

-Vermont was our first vacation, just the three of us (Missi, Max, and me). This state was our second choice for a honeymoon so we wanted to eventually check it out. I'm used to road trips to Colorado with my family, taking maybe two days to get to our destination. This trip, we intentionally meandered up the eastern part of the country, leisurely stopping at various places along the way. It was a great way to do a vacation and I can't wait until the next time. Vermont is beautiful by the way if you've never been. I'd say it's a good in-between of Alaska and Colorado, there are busy towns if you want the Colorado life, and there's plenty of space and seclusion if you want the Alaska feel.

10.) Murphy bed, August 2017-March 2019. Building anything practical and functional was never something I thought I'd ever do. Seeing as our guest room was only utilized when guests came, I wanted to be able to use it for either a music or a prayer room, or anything rather than just sit there most of the year. I saw an article about murphy beds and the idea would never be able to leave my head until I built one and installed it. With a lot of help and building space from my friend Jason, we did a few hours of work here and there over the course of a year and a half. The video that we went off of said it might take a weekend to build. Ha! Honestly, I don't think this bed would've been as memorable had it only taken an easy weekend. I learned a lot about furniture and I'm so happy that it has been serving it's purpose most of this year. We've used it for music, working out, quiet times, taking tests, and for when guests come to visit.

There are probably things I'm forgetting. In ministry, and I suppose in marriage and parenting as well, there are many little moments that may seem insignificant and maybe not so memorable, but over time, those little things, the constant presence in a person's life, that can have much more significant impact on a person's life. I've witnessed some great connections with families in our neighborhood, just simply because we've been around for a long time. Don't underestimate your impact on those around, don't waste those moments, they are given to you for a purpose (and it's not for your purposes).

Happy New Year and have a great rest of your week!