My first internship, we watched a slideshow of the Summer Day Camp with kids having fun, smiling, laughing. I can't really explain the way my heart felt with each new picture that was projected on the wall, but I can try. Each picture pounded me into a deeper part of my heart. Whether I wanted it to happen or not, the Holy Spirit brought me to one of the most powerful moments of my life. I was quickly being brought to tears. Each face a person, created in God's image, with lives, souls, needing love, needing Jesus, living life hopefully effected forevermore by that summer, then dying a death, and facing a judge. I am a person, created in God's image, with a life, a soul, needing love, needing Jesus, will die a death, will face a judge. These kids are like me. I had to leave the auditorium and find the corner of a hallway to weep in. God was with me in that corner, holding me, giving me a snapshot of His undying love for me, His deep......you will not guess what just happened even now. While I was thinking of a word to go after "deep", for some reason the word "unction" came to my mind. But it has never been in my mind before now. Perhaps I heard it before but I couldn't define it and I definitely have never used it before. "Unction" means an annointing or healing, a comforting or soothing. I'm sort of freaking out right now. In that corner over a year ago, this glimpse of God was His unction for me. That sounds weird to use in a sentence. He was unctioning me. I don't know how to use it in a sentence obviously. I cried hard, out of joy not sorrow. Everything in me wanted those kids to one day down the road not fall into the stuff that people fall into here. Drugs, dealing, prostituting, stealing, cursing, lying.
Everything today is so quick. Internet, twitter, and facebook are increasingly getting closer to the speed of thought. "That cloud looks like a twinkie, let me make sure everyone knows about it right now." The meaningless forced meaningful. Unimportant important. Chapter 2 of A.W. Tozer's book, The Pursuit of God talks a lot about the throne of our hearts. Titled "The Blessedness of Possessing Nothing," chapter 2 warns that God's gifts have taken the place of God. He writes, "The pronouns my and mine look innocent enough in print, but their constant and universal use s significant. They are verbal symptoms of our deep disease. The roots of our hearts have grown down into things, and we dare not pull up one rootlet lest we die."
Some disposable cameras are/were limited to about 20 pictures. Some pictures even needed to be shaken like a Polaroid. Even longer back, pictures took a long time to develop. My brain wants a picture of God here, another one there, a revealing of himself here, blessings and direction there. It doesn't stop. I need to slow down. God's pace is different than my own. The amount of growth I hope to see in these kids ten years down the road will not be the same amount of growth I see in one three-hour period. This unction I am grateful. This picture of God is not worth a thousand words, but rather, my entire life. I will never forget that moment in the hallway. A couple days ago, I was looking in the picture archives of 2nd Mile Ministries and saw many younger yet familiar little faces. Some of the kids in our program with missing teeth, bigger eyes, rounder heads (I think), and now I am investing in those lives five days a week. It reminded me of the unction and put these kids' lives in a longer perspective than I once perceived. Photographs were developed slowly with the presence of light. Get the picture? 1 John 1:5b, "God is light; in him there is no darkness at all."
As promised, let me introduce another kid. Diallo (dee-AH-low). He is in fourth grade and Challah's older brother (Keyo's younger brother). He is also very loud and demands attention. He, like Challah, hides his weaknesses but is very smart. He learns by watching, figures something out in his head, then can do it perfectly. He's competitive, athletic, and is an influence (sometimes good sometimes bad). Basically, he has leadership skills and speaks his mind, even if he's interrupting a lesson or conversation. Before the program started, I had only heard of him. On day one, I was introduced to my school-year-long internship with loud shouts, directionless running, fence-climbing, wild and free Diallo. I think I even saw foam coming out of his mouth (ok, that might've just been the fear). When he reads out loud, he mumbles as if he can't read some words, but his comprehension is incredible. His words can be violent in nature and he can come across as tough, but whenever a tiny child (from a volunteer) visits or an extra hand is needed, he is reliable for willingly helping without being asked. That gives me some hope that God can stretch out this rare snapshot of kindness into a solid man of godly character down the road. I spend the most time with him because he loves attention but also needs attention in order to excel to his greatest potential. He is capable of doing homework himself, but will give up easily if no one is there to keep him from being bored. Pray for me.
Please pray:
-For God to help Diallo's words and actions to grow to be more respectful towards the other kids and us adults throughout this year.
-For God's leading to what we should do about Keyshawn and Jeffery (brothers who only showed up Monday last week), whether or not to keep them in the program, to continue on with only eight kids, or pursue a couple more kids to be added.
-For a more permanent vehicle for transporting the kids (renting a van every week will get costly).
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