Playing Catch Up

It's almost exactly halfway through summer vacation for teachers and students all across the country.  I'm not really a teacher, but I have felt the definite need for rest from the past school year.  By far, the 2013-2014 school year has been the most difficult time of ministry I've experienced.  There are many outward circumstances that have contributed to this, but I confess that my reactions (or lack thereof) to those circumstances have made situations harder to deal with.

Probably the worst subconscious decision that people make is when the going gets tough, striving to handle it with your own strength.  I don't know if anyone else feels this way, but when I have "control" or "power" or "authority", it can sometimes get to my head and make me think that I did something special.  I did that.  Coach Carter, acted by Samuel L. Jackson in the movie Coach Carter, upset with his team getting cocky after winning a couple games, decides to cheer for himself at practice after his team executed a play and scores.  "That's me baby! That's me! I did that! I drew that up! Yeah! Ha HA! Run it again."  He did this to prove a point.  Did the coach score those two points?  No.  One of his players tells him, "Coach, your shoe's untied."  After Coach ties his shoes he declares, "Whooo!  Look at that bow!  Look at that!  I tied that!"

Even if I correctly take life's circumstances, figure out the perfect way to handle it or fix it on my own strength, knowledge, and power, it would be crazy for me to get cocky and feel good about myself for something that God has enabled me to do.  God has every thing in his control.  As Psalm 93 begins, "The LORD reigns!"  He is in control of everything.

I realize that I haven't blogged since March.  Leading the after school program has taken a lot of energy out of me and has been a huge priority.  I've never led anything this big before and being unsure of how to handle specific situations has put me in a state of suspended weakness.  After a few meetings with my boss and explaining the difficult year and all that came with it, she had the audacity to pray graciously to God, thanking Him for putting me through such a hard year so that I could see things from my inner being come to the surface more.  I kind of see her point.  Had I not have had a rough year, there would be a lot that I wouldn't have realized about myself.  I can get easily embittered towards just about anything, I had tremendous pride, I like to have control, I have a hard time trusting anybody but myself, the list goes on.

However, I must declare that I identify with Christ because He took all these sins and buried them in the tomb and put them to death with Himself on the cross.  Gone.  The power of these sins are no longer powerful.  With Christ, I am made free from those things.  Galatians 5:1 says, "It is for freedom that Christ has set us free.  Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves become enslaved by a yoke of slavery."

There was one day where a first grade boy refused to stay seated at snack time.  He wanted more apples right then and now even though he was told he'd get more soon.  He proceeded to sit under the table refusing to move.  After much screaming, biting, scratching, kicking, punching, he had to be removed.  How would you feel about your ability to handle that situation?  What's more frustrating is that when I've gone to the park with this kid, he was perfectly fine.  It's days like this that I wish I was in a position where I'm confident in my own self, my own abilities, and my own control.

Probably in another blog, when I've taken a good amount of time to process through the school year, I'll tell you more about the visible things God has been doing in my life and the kids' lives, but right now, I'd like to share some of my favorite pictures I took since August 2013.  Not all are of work or ministry necessarily, but all show a small glimpse of what life looked like for me this past year.

This is Ferrell.  Give a kid your phone and they will take some awesome pictures with it.  Challah and Ferrell were the only kids to get picked up from Brentwood Elementary for most of the year.  They were the only kids in the van for about 20 minutes before picking up the rest of the kids at North Shore Elementary.  They made the van ride less boring for sure.

Sunrise at Jacksonville beach.  Great way to spend a day off.  Only a few dog walkers and extreme runners up this early.

Ferrell and Challah helping pick up trash in the streets.  Every other week, we helped out in a nutritional garden in our neighborhood (planting, watering, weeding, raking, lifting, etc.) as well as pick up garbage.  Surprisingly, they looked forward to doing this each time.  These two were good sports about it.

Getting a new phone for me means pocket dialing people and hitting buttons accidentally.  When my new phone is shaken, it opens up the camera.  When I leave my phone in my pocket while playing basketball or kickball, it might take 50 photos before I realize it.  This pic was taken through my mesh shorts while I was defending Shavez, Challah's older brother in basketball.  I thought this was pretty awesome.

 

Our beautiful Jacksonville arboretum.

We learned about Japan one day and the co-director's father trained in karate while he was in college.  Awesome fun! HYAH!!!

On one of our field trips to the park, Mekhi insisted on climbing a tree and getting down by himself with no help.  I see a lot of similarities between Mekhi and myself.  No bragging here, but he is very smart, observant, and independent, but he also has a very hard time trusting people, especially adults.

Ernest on Valentine's Day got this huge stuffed bear and didn't know who to give it to.  Classic Ernest!  Big personality,  a big time player making big time plays in big time games.

Pure joy.  Challah's younger sister Quran is pulling my good friend Ernest in a little toy car thingy.  I'm not sure which of the two is having more fun.

Charity trying to imitate Ray Charles' picture.  Spot on!

At one point during the school year, there was a fire at North Shore Elementary School.  Luckily nobody was hurt and only damage to inside the ceilings and walls of one or two classrooms was done.  This meant that the whole school, during the "cold" part of the year, was evacuated to the nearby high school football field until dismissal.  The local news came and our program kids were all excited at the chance to possibly be on TV.  Mekhi, who the camera is pointing to, answered the man's questions so willingly and eloquently for a third grader.  I also thought that this picture showed how sweet it was for Michaella (in white T-shirt) to offer her leopard-print jacket to her chilly younger brother.

Rick's Cafe in Negril, Jamaica.  Workers at the restaurant would jump in water from 85 ft in the air for $20.  I jumped from only like 35 ft and it was terrifying.  I was in Jamaica for a buddy's wedding.  It was definitely an experience.

Hopefully, this attempt to get you caught up on my life was sufficient.  Probably the biggest news of my life so far I obviously have yet to tell you.  I gots marriaged!!!  June 21st, I married Missi Schock.  This will be a blog in the future.